Bondage vs. Freedom

I was enslaved by my addiction, preventing me from seeing beyond the black and dreary existence of my day-to-day life. When I wasn’t using, I was isolated in my room, figuring out ways to stay numb. After failed attempts to support me, my friends started to distance themselves. My family was exhausted. They tried everything they could think of, (numerous rehabs, counselors, psychiatrists), but nothing worked. My health started to deteriorate and my soul was lost. As the big book says, “I was at the jumping-off point, I wished for the end”.

Then Christ came and changed everything! I went to my first AA meeting Feb 8th, 2020.It was obvious to me that God’s hand led me to this particular meeting. Walking in I was terrified, but God gave me the strength and courage to put myself out there for others to see. After the meeting, six girls rushed up to me giving me hugs and offering a lending hand. One of the girls asked if I needed a temporary sponsor and if I wanted to go out to eat with them that night. I very quickly said, Yes! I knew immediately that God was talking to me through these girls, telling me I was right where I needed to be, I was Home! After this one night, I was instantly a part of something bigger than me and I loved it! For the first time in years, I had a sense of Hope.

This new-found awareness gave me the confidence to call Nancy at the NCCDP and tell her I was ready to take the journey to Freedom. Before joining the CDP, Nancy suggested I complete the 3 month IOP group sessions, followed by the Aftercare group meetings. After completion, I joined the CDP in May 2020. While being a part of IOP, Aftercare, and NCCDP, I have built long-term relationships with others like Me! I can’t put into words how incredible it is to be around others who understand your past, present, and future! Building these relationships within the program has given me the confidence to rekindle relationships with family and friends outside the program. Throughout this journey, I’ve gained self-awareness. This has opened up many doors, and now I know how to set boundaries, admit when I am wrong then apologize, have compassion for others, respond not react, and most of all, how to Love! I am so grateful to have a life of color today! Thank you Bill, Nancy, and Betty for the patience, love, and support offered to me during the most difficult, yet Beautiful time of my life!

~ A Grateful Recovering Addict ~