Mental Health→Addiction→Recovery: My Journey

Part 1: Dental School, Residency, and Unresolved Trauma

Before dental school, my life was already burdened with unresolved issues. A family member’s suicide, another’s severe illness, and lingering childhood trauma cast along shadow over my well-being. Despite my attempts to keep it together, I was not in a good place.

Dental school was a demanding and stressful period. Although I performed well academically, my mental health was deteriorating. Seeking help, I was prescribed Adderall. Initially, it felt like a lifeline, helping me focus and escape my underlying issues. I began taking more than the prescribed dose, rationalizing that it was just Adderall—a common drug in college circles. With easy access to additional pills from friends and an unmonitored prescription, I spiraled into addiction, though I failed to recognize it at the time.

In my fourth year my anxiety intensified. I graduated and began working amidst this internal chaos, barely holding it together. My boyfriend frequently expressed concern about my Adderall consumption, but I dismissed it, believing I needed the drug to cope.The breaking point came when my boyfriend, with existing health vulnerabilities, fell ill.

Terrified, my anxiety soared. I couldn’t sleep or focus. It became my crutch.I continued struggling until a crucial, albeit reckless, decision changed everything. I made a reckless comment at work about pills and someone reported it to my boss. Consequently, I was sent home while they deliberated my fate.

Part 2: Rehab and NCCDP

Facing the reality of my situation, I self-reported to the NCCDP (North Carolina Caring Dental Professionals) and confessed to my employer. In order to avoid being reported to the board, NCCDP mandated a facility evaluation, which I assumed would be a brief formality. Instead, it marked the beginning of a three-month rehab stay, a reluctant journey toward recovery.

In rehab, I began working with a therapist and ceased taking Adderall. My medication was now closely monitored, and I started addressing the deep-seated traumas I had long ignored. Initially, I resisted, resentful of being labeled an addict. However, I gradually engaged with the steps, meetings, and having difficult conversations with my family. Slowly, acceptance crept in. I realized I needed this structure and support.

Determined to start fresh, I left my current job, moved in with my boyfriend, and secured a job in his city while still in rehab. My exit plan included ongoing therapy, psychiatric oversight, and NCCDP accountability. Signing a five-year NCCDP contract felt daunting, butI committed, understanding it was essential for my recovery.

Part 3: Post-Rehab NCCDP, Acceptance, and Recovery

Initially, I resented NCCDP’s demands. Yet, as I adhered to its requirements—attending meetings, completing paperwork—I noticed significant improvement. Work posed challenges: I was unexpectedly the sole provider in an office, managing without an experienced mentor. The pressure was immense, but recovery enabled me to navigate these struggles healthily, growing as a dentist and a leader.

My relationship with my boyfriend, now husband, deepened. He acknowledged that without my recovery journey, we wouldn’t have stayed together. We are now expecting our first child. Our bond strengthened by our shared faith and commitment. Trusting in a greater plan, even when it seemed obscure, proved vital.

Recovery and NCCDP transformed my life. I emerged as a healthier person, a better dentist, a loving wife, and soon, a nurturing parent. Despite my initial reluctance, embracing the process brought me to a place of gratitude and fulfillment. Recovery isn’t easy, but it’s a path worth taking—a journey that saved my life and allowed me to thrive.

I am profoundly grateful for this journey. It taught me resilience, humility, and the importance of seeking help. The struggles I faced in recovery forged a stronger, more compassionate version ofmyself. This journey was not just about overcoming addiction; it was about rediscovering my purpose, rebuilding relationships, and learning to live with authenticity and integrity. Each step, no matter how difficult, was a necessary part of my growth. Recovery taught me that true strength lies in vulnerability and that asking for help is a sign of courage, not weakness. This path has led me to a life filled with love, purpose, and hope—an invaluable gift that I cherish every day.

— A Grateful Recovering Dentist —