The Main Thing
What is the main thing recovery has given me in life?
Sometimes it’s hard to remember what my life was like before recovery. I think it’s a good exercise to think back to those times, remember how awful things were, how unmanageable every day seemed.
It’s so easy to find gratitude for the wonderful things in my life today with my past as a mirror of contrast.
I’ve been asked what is the main thing recovery has given me in my life? There are so many wonderful gifts of recovery it’s hard to chose just one. Is it the fact that I can now sleep well? How about the fact that I no longer beat myself up when I make a mistake? Or, I really like this one, how about how I have learned to mind my own business and not offer unsolicited advice!
These gifts are all really great, I could list many more. When I give it serious thought, the main thing recovery has given me is the gift of fellowship.
Prior to recovery, I was so isolated with my use of substances and my worry of how to get my substances. Everything revolved around my use or lack of my substance of choice. I did not want to be around friends or family. They interfered with my substance use. I was so isolated.
I lived in my head and it was a dangerous place to be. I was so alone. Recovery has provided me a place to share my experiences and feelings with others who have traveled a similar path. I have relationships with people who understand because they have lived a similar pain. I have authentic true relationships with others who embrace the principals of honesty, openness, and integrity. I know that I could call any number of people in the middle of the night and they would be there for me.
I know that when I leave this earth I won’t take anything with me, but I will leave behind my part in all the relationships I have had with people in my life. If I have been connected and made a difference in someone’s life, as well as , they in mine, that is a true gift!
As humans, I think we all yearn to be a part of something, for being connected to one another.
Recovery has given me this sense of being a part of and for that I am so very grateful.